I wrote this stream of consciousness in November 2018. A lot of this no longer applies to my life or what I am currently anxious but I think it accurately portrays my anxiety and depression. More than that, I think it is very illustrative of what many people fear, ruminate, and believe.
Read MoreMy whole life I have been an avid reader and in the last ten years, I have really taken to self-help books. Self-help, spiritual, advice or whatever you want to call them, I love them. I’ve read dozens and they have made a positive impact on my life. Here are a five of my favorites that I recommend to my friends all of the time.
Read MoreI’ve been alluding to some big things happening for me and I can finally share them with you now! Read to figure out what is going on with me and where I’m headed.
Read MoreA love letter to all the girls in my life. I call out some specific stories. But this is a love letter to all women and girls. I see you. I see all the shit you’ve been through. I see all the strength you give every day. I see all the love you give. Photo credit: The Upspeak Collective
Read MoreOur society has told us that only worthy women can have abortions. Women need to have a “valid reason”. Extreme examples would be rape or health issues. But many believe that a woman should only get it if she can’t support the baby. They make a list of reasons why a woman should/should not have an abortion. And then tell us to not use the word on television, or in public.
Read MoreI spent my first Christmas alone this year. And at the end of the night, I wrote an unfiltered and unapologetic essay about how I was feeling.
Read MoreI’ve had some pretty toxic jobs in my life. Where I was bombarded with feedback. About my hair, face, and tone of my voice. I believe that I got a lot of this feedback because I was and am authentic and live with vulnerability.
Read MoreI told everyone I was fine. And I would point to all the shit I was doing - teaching myself photography and photoshop. I was blogging a ton and getting featured on other sites (albeit unpaid) etc. But everyone wanted to know what was the plan. How I was going to make money? It was and is a valid question. I didn’t have an answer and I felt completely useless. Read more to learn why I chose a spade to get tattooed on my forearm.
Read MoreI’ve always admired my dad’s successful career. Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes me different than my dad. How did our paths turn out so differently? I’ve had plenty of opportunities that should have allowed me to climb a ladder. Why didn’t they work for me? Why did they always feel wrong? Am I flawed? Or do I just have something to say?
Read MoreI am so unbelievably lucky. I will never have to write a letter to a senator telling them that the nominee they are about to consider had molested in me my sleep. I will never have to testify during a Supreme Court nomination hearing and retell my story of being sexually assaulted by my babysitter. Yes, I am lucky.
Read MoreI moved to Cleveland, exactly four years ago, on October 3rd 2014. I moved here for a job. I was kind of sick of Chicago. I was looking to move but never thought it would be to a smaller city, still in the midwest. And I love it. But whenever I am asked how I like living here, I always respond, “I love it. But I won’t die here.”
Read MoreWhere I’ve been. What I’ve been doing. With whom. And why. Catching you up on my life this summer and fill you in on why I have been posting so irregular now.
Read MoreWhat no one tells you about being a survivor of sexual assault and sharing your story, you are constantly catching your breath while running as fast as you can. When you are public about this experience, you will get an onslaught of emotions from others - friends, family, strangers. This is the story of how I dealt with some of the added pressure.
Read MoreI have moved around a lot in my life and I’ve always said I don’t have a hometown. Throughout my life, I have moved around a lot. Throughout my whole life. I think it’s something like 25 apartments/houses, spread throughout 10 cities, five states, and two countries. It’s been exciting but I want community. And I found that in Cleveland. But now I might move.
Read MoreHere are some of my favorite quotes. Most are from books. A few of them are tattooed on me, which has inspired me to do another post soon on all my tattoos and what they mean. Too many are from Love Warrior. But they all make my heart hurt reading them.
Read MoreObviously, I love weddings. I love an open bar, and a dance floor, and getting dressed up and feeling fancy. But one thing I hate: finding a date. I’m not good at it. And that might be largely due to the fact that most men in my life are keeping me warm, in case they feel like hanging out, once a moon cycle. In this essay, I describe my complicated relationship with weddings, dating, and my own independence.
Read MoreTrigger warning: This post contains graphic content of sexual assault and sexual abuse against a child. For a long time, I’ve thought about sharing my story of sexual assault in writing. Well today, I’m doing it. I am nervous (as fuck does not begin to cover it). But I am mostly proud and feel in control of my story for the first time in my life.
I follow a ton of lifestyle bloggers. They are perfect. In every possible way. They have great bodies, beautiful families, dope vacations. Maybe its perfect in a purely aesthetic way. I don’t care. I love them.
Read MoreMost of my writing is very honest and vulnerable but a lot of it revolves around me forgiving others. Sometimes for what people have taught me to believe about myself. But sometimes we need to acknowledge how we have hurt others and forgive ourselves.
Read MoreMy whole life people have called me a bitch (in some way or other), which really impacted how I thought of my self. Spoiler alert: I developed terrible self worth. But I’m finally getting over that and realizing that those comments were about the people saying it - not me.
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